Inferiority.

When the world is sound asleep, I lay awake contemplating all that is and all that could be.

Every night before I go to sleep, I find myself lying there just staring at the ceiling thinking.  Just thinking.  Some nights I fall asleep, some nights I can't.  My Macbook sleeps besides me most nights.  It allows me to chat with friends, leave comments or drawings on their facebooks while they are sleeping or just to read about things I'm interested in.  Its the one thing that helps me fall asleep.  On this particular night as I was surfing the internet, I came across my Professor's website.  He's  a freelancing graphic designer as well as a professor at SJSU.  Although I did not find his website aesthetically pleasing,  the work that was on it exceeded what I am currently capable of.  There, on the left column of the home page  a link that said Action Action Action caught my eye, so I clicked it.  It was a link to an Art gallery for SJSU BFA Graphic design graduates of 2009.  What I aspire to be.  The site had the designers featured in this exhibit listed.  Each with a name, website, and resume.  I took the time to look at each of these amazing designer's websites.  Their portfolios were astounding.  They all had beautiful designs for posters, maps, perfume packaging, CD cases.  They even had video introductions to movies they would like to see based on their favorite book.  It blew my mind.  What am I doing majoring in Graphic Design?  Could I ever be as talented as they are?  Probably not.  I can only hope to learn and grow artistically for a chance to be as talented as others.